Tip toes lost? Tarp ton lust? Top Ten List? Hey, that sounds catchy.
Let's first talk about misery.
Their lying. Our hard work. Their cheating. Our Drinking.
Wait, am I talking about being a professor? Hell no, That's country music. Funny that you should get them confused. But now that gets me to thinking. Most professors might think that they and country music are like this:
That's a Venn diagram.
There's a lot in country music that y'all might appreciate. It's about upholding traditional values (think standards of conduct in your classroom). There's also themes about mama, trains, trucks, prison, getting drunk and the misuse of MLA formatting. OK, I made up that last one. Trust me. It's like ol' Hank wrote his songs about us.
Shit, where was I going with this? Oh, yeah. A top ten list.
Top Ten Country Songs for College Faculty (links are to actual songs)
10. He Stopped Attending Her Class Today
9. Where Were You (When You Should Have Been Studying)
8. If You’ve Got the Money, We’ve Got the Tuition Bill
7. Have I Told You Lately That You Won’t Pass My Class
6. I’m So Underpaid I Could Cry
5. Folsom County Community College Adjunct Blues
I Am a Student of Constant Excuses
2. Blue Eyes Cryin’ for Extra Credit
1. Stand By Your Syllabus
I hope y'all drank as much reading this as I did writing it.